As our fathers age, they want to remain independent, not be a burden, and—no offense—they usually don’t want to move in with their children. Helping your dad safely age at home can be the best best Father's Day gift you can give him, once you notice even small changes in his ability to get around.

Remember “Men are from Mars?” Men do not often express their feelings freely or at all. So if your father is living alone, it will be harder for you to know how he is doing. The hardest part may be getting your Dad to open up about practical and emotional issues.”

When talking with dad, go slow and steady. Approach one issue at a time. Fathers may want to appear as if they’re always in control, even when things have begun to slip. Let your dad know that you are there to help without getting in his space. In order to assess how he’s doing living on his own, here is a checklist of issues for you to explore with him. Then, if there are problems, you can address them, and find your father the help he’ll need to stay independent.

Activity and Connectedness

The most important indicators for wellness in aging are staying physically active and staying connected to others or to a community. Does your dad appear to be slowing down? Is he less mobile? Is he exercising, interacting with his neighbors, or participating in senior-activity programs? We tend to look away from physical changes that are important in supporting our dads.

Housekeeping

When you visit your father at his home, look around and get a quick reading on whether he could use help with home repairs or housecleaning. Remember to think